


The Right People

by Wheres_my_badger



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: But then again who doesn't, Crossdressing, Felix!centric - Freeform, Fluff, M/M, Seo Changbin is Whipped, Shy Lee Felix, as usual, idk what else to tag, so I'll just end this here, they all love felix very much, they are all very sweet and supportive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-08-02 03:45:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16297535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wheres_my_badger/pseuds/Wheres_my_badger
Summary: Felix sometimes likes putting on makeup and wearing pretty clothes. Unfortunately, he's the only one who gets to see himself like that. Until he isn't.





	The Right People

**Author's Note:**

> This turned out shorter than I expected, but oh well. I hope you guys like it!
> 
> ALSO: this is related to the Found Family series, but you don't need to read that to understand this one.

Felix carefully finished putting on his makeup, then took a look at the finished product. His cheeks were rosy from the blush he had applied, and eyelids were sparkling with the soft purple eye shadow. He had also used some eyeliner and mascara, and his lips were pink with the lipstick he had chosen. He sighed as he looked at himself. Usually all of that made him feel pretty. At the moment it just made him anxious.

Ignoring his fast heartbeat he got up, walking up to his closet and picking up the outfit he had chosen. It was simple. A pretty lavender croptop and a pleated white skirt. He put on the clothes carefully, finishing it up with a delicate necklace he had gotten recently. And then, before he chickened out, he sent Changbin a message.

Felix had always been attracted to ‘girl clothes’ and makeup. When he was still a little kid, his mother often caught him messing with her things, trying to put on makeup with all of his six-year-old coordination. She always shook her head at him, before cleaning him up and telling him those things were for girls, and that he wasn’t supposed to use them.

Felix never really understood it. He always felt comfortable and confident when he wore those things, so why couldn’t he use them? That is until he grew up a bit and started to notice the world wasn’t too kind to people who were different. It wasn’t easy for him to learn. Until he made the mistake of going to one of his friends’ party wearing a princess dress.

His mother hadn’t seen it, because Felix knew, by then, that she wouldn’t allow him to wear that. So he had hidden his costume under his ‘normal’ clothes, and once she dropped him off he had taken off his clothes and walked into the party feeling pretty and confident. That was the first time in his life Felix felt ashamed of wearing the clothes he liked. He had blocked most of what his friends had told him on that day from his memory, but the feeling of hurt never really faded.

So Felix had learned to hide. He wasn’t willing to stop, he loved dressing up and wearing makeup. But he grew up to think of it as a dirty little secret, and not as a form of expression. And he hadn’t told a soul about it. Until he joined JYP.

Now, one would think that joining a company in a country like South Korea, that refused to even acknowledge that LGBT people existed, would make Felix even more scared of sharing his secret. And it had, at first. Until Felix met Chan and the rest of the boy’s group, and little by little started to see that maybe the problem wasn’t him after all. Maybe he had just been around the wrong people.

It wasn’t an easy process. Felix often waited for the others to be out or busy before locking himself in his room and putting on the clothes he loved so much. He then just did whatever he felt like doing, feeling comfortable and happy, before the others started coming back and he had to undress and put everything away. But without him even noticing, the idea of telling someone about it started growing on his mind.

When the others started opening up about their problems – unwillingly, at first –, the idea started getting stronger and stronger on Felix’s mind. If Jisung could walk around with a pacifier, why couldn’t he walk around in a skirt or dress? He and the others thought Jisung’s little habit was adorable. Maybe they would think the same of him. And so he had decided he would tell someone. He just had to choose whom.

Choosing Changbin hadn’t been easy. Felix first choice had been Chan, because he had never trusted anyone as much as he trusted Chan. But then he had thought of Changbin, and… well, Changbin was his boyfriend. And Felix was scared to death of the boy’s reaction, scared of losing Changbin, but… but this was a huge part of who Felix was, and he wanted Changbin to know every part of him.

So he had chosen Changbin. It had been hard telling him. Felix had pulled him aside one day and had barely managed to stutter out that he had something important to tell Changbin. The boy had been sweet, probably noticing Felix’s distressed expression, and had waited for Felix to talk without pressuring him. And it had taken him quite some time, but in the end he had managed to say it.

Felix had expected at least a few seconds of confusion from Changbin’s part. Instead, Changbin had smiled before Felix could even finish.

“Not that you aren’t pretty right now, but you must look beautiful wearing the things you like.”

Felix heart had tried to beat out of his chest, and he had looked down, cheeks completely red, a smile on his face. And Changbin had pulled him into a hug and assured him that it was ok.

“I love you, Lix.”

He had said, and behind that Felix could hear everything Changbin didn’t voice, but meant.

 

And now Felix was ready to show Changbin.

The boy had asked him to see it only once. Felix had told him he wasn’t ready, not yet, but that he would surely show Changbin one day. And Changbin had accepted that and hadn’t asked Felix ever again. Until Felix was ready.

At the moment, Felix didn’t feel all that ready. He felt a bit sick, and nervous as hell. But he knew he could trust Changbin. The door opened and Felix looked down.

Felix heard the door closing, and then there was silence for a while. Then Changbin’s voice.

“Can I touch you, Lix?”

Felix had looked up, and the look on Changbin’s face made his heart stutter. Changbin was looking at Felix like he was precious. Like he was beautiful. Felix noticed, then, how much he had believed he was a freak, until that very moment.

“Yes.”

He answered. Changbin put his hands on his hips, then looked Felix up and down, and then kissed Felix.

It was soft. A careful kiss, as if Changbin was scared Felix would break. Felix melted in the older’s arms. When they parted, Changbin squeezed his waist.

“You look beautiful.”

He said. Felix smiled.

“Thank you.”

Felix felt, on that afternoon, the same confidence he felt as a child, before people around him had shunned him for being who he was.

 

After that, Felix started dressing up more often. The others didn’t usually bother him and Changbin when they were together in one of their rooms. They couldn’t go on dates outside, so those moments alone were their dates, and all of the others understood and respected that. And so Felix started using those as opportunities. He didn’t always dress up, because he didn’t always want to. Changbin had asked him about it, and Felix had explained the fluidity of his needs. He explained to Changbin that sometimes he just felt like wearing his ‘normal’ clothes, and sometimes he wanted to wear ‘girl clothes’. Changbin had accepted the explanation, and Felix had a feeling he didn’t quite understand, but was trying to. And that was what counted.

And then they had talked about Felix telling the others, and Felix had told Changbin that yes, he did want to tell them. But slowly. And so he had started working up the courage to tell Chan.

 

Telling Chan turned out to be easier than expected. Maybe it was because Felix had already told Changbin. Maybe it was because Chan had been proving again and again how supportive of a friend he was when Hyunjin’s problem came to light. For whatever reason, when Felix told Chan, he didn’t stutter or feel scared, although he blushed a bit.

Chan gave him the brightest smile. His eyes lit up as he asked Felix if he had clothes and what kinds of clothes he had, and Felix almost cried from happiness. He told Chan about what he liked wearing, and then tentatively offered to let Chan see him wearing his clothes one day. Chan beamed at him, and Felix couldn’t help but to laugh, relieved and happy.

A few days later Chan had showed up with a simple light green dress with white details, and had given it to Felix. Felix didn’t know what he had done to deserve such a good person in his life.

 

After that, Felix told Seungmin, although he hadn’t planned that. But Seungmin’s distress and the way he was trusting Felix gave the older the last little push he needed to open up. So he had told Seungmin. And it had been different from when he told Chan and Changbin. With Seungmin, Felix opened up about how wearing makeup and beautiful clothes made him feel.

He told the younger boy about everything from how beautiful he felt to how he still fought against the feelings of embarrassment that came with it. Seungmin hadn’t had an overly positive reaction like the other two. Instead, he had thanked Felix for trusting him, and the older had felt in that thanks how much Seungmin appreciated him at the moment.

And for some reason, that had been the catalyst to Felix telling the others. Seungmin’s simple ‘thank you for trusting me’ had reminded Felix of how much those people loved him. And he had, a few days later as they walked along a street market, pulled out a dress and showed it to Changbin, asking what he thought about it.

The others had watched him, all seeming curious, because Felix had made sure his voice sounded genuine, and not joking. Changbin had been quick to understand, and had smiled widely.

“It’s nice. I think you would look really pretty in it.”

He had said. Felix had smiled.

A bit later, Hyunjin had pulled out a skirt and handed it to Felix.

“I like this colour on you.”

He had said, smiling, and Jeongin nodded, and when Felix smiled, Woojin had taken the skirt from them and bought it without even asking anything, before handing it to Felix.

Felix loved his friends a lot.

 

The first time he dressed up and went out of his room he was a bit nervous. But Changbin was holding his hand, and the others didn’t even blink at his outfit, making space for him and Changbin on the couch. He was wearing the skirt Woojin had bought, and it felt nice to finally be able to be himself in front of them.

“Hyunjinnie was right, it looks pretty, Lix.”

Said Minho, as Felix sat down next to him. Felix smiled at him.

“Thanks, hyung.”

Minho smiled back. Jisung, who was lying on Minho, looked up and smiled.

“That’s such a cute shirt.”

He said, and Felix’s cheeks actually hurt from how big he was smiling.

“Look, I love you guys and all, but can we focus here, hyungs?”

Said Jeongin. He, too, had a smile on his face. The others laughed and turned to the TV, starting the – very long – process of choosing a movie for the night. Felix snuggled close to Changbin, and the older pressed a kiss to the top of his head. Felix had been right. He wasn’t the wrong one. He had just taken a while to find the right people.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure if I managed to put the feeling I wanted into this, but I tried. What do you guys think?


End file.
